The other day I decided that I needed to go on a fast and so I did and to be honest I thoroughly enjoyed the euphoric feeling when I was done. I was a a bit lighter and a bit more cheerful. Fast forward a couple of days, I'm driving home from work and suddenly my car comes to a halt at a stop light it wont go forward or backward and I'm blocking the road, I restart the engine and get to a safer spot on the road where I park, knowing that something is obviously extremely wrong I begin to call around and I can get a hold of noone in my mind i am lonely slightly scared and wondering what I am tot do.
Immediately this feeling of dispair comes over me and I begin to question God and ask why he has allowed me this trial at this point in my life and how how could abandon me like this. Things in my life following my fast had quickly started to crumble (as my feeble mind would over react it) my clock broke, I slammed my fingers almost breaking one, I was genuinely wondering how I would manage the rest of the month and then that. it was all too overwhelming I wondered and questioned god and his powers and ability to guide and help me.
later that night I was in my house thinking about all that had happened to me and it hit me... Why was I questioning the motives of the man in whose hands I had put my life only a few days before the man i know is all powerful and all knowing? Yes my car shut off and ill need a major overhall or divine intervention but what if I was saved from a major accident that could have proven deadly, my finger got slammed and bled it could have been broken my clock stopped working it could have been my heart. I refuse to allow the feeble attempts of the devil to thwart me and make me doubt my god I'm gonna keep to it, stick to it, have faith in and work and wait patiently for my lord to deliver me from my tests.
Dedicated to AGT always having faith and never doubting you inspire me...